David Spade

I was cruising along Doheny Drive when my Pap Alert goes off. I look at my phone and it says “Private” on it. I answered my phone and to my surprise it was Georgie.

With her English accent she says, “There are a whole bunch of Paparazzi with their cameras and battery packs waiting for someone to come out of the Giorgio Armani in Beverly Hills. They are on the alley just east of Rodeo Dr. You should come check it out. I think that it could be a guy that they are waiting for.”

“Ok! I am close to the neighborhood, I’ll go check it out,” I responded. When I get there, sure enough, I see six to eight paparazzi armed and ready to shoot. I quickly parked next to another paparazzi’s car which was taking up some room in the alley. We were not blocking it; one car could easily pass by.

I get my battery pack and I put it around my shoulder. I get the flash cord and I quickly connect the flash to my camera. I close the door and as start to walk to meet up with the rest, I connected the battery pack to my flash. I fired a couple of shots in the air to check my flash. Well, I did have to check if everything was ok before the real thing. A few minutes later, a Maroon PT Cruiser is driven up from the parking garage to the back of the store. This was our cue that it was about to go down. We all get in the firing line-up.

Mind you, I was ready for a dude to come out since Georgie said it was a dude. Nope! This thin, blonde, almost divorced lady comes out. Can you guess who it is?

Yup! None other than one of the biggest story’s in England…Heather Mills comes out. She is currently getting a divorce from Sir Paul McCartney. Everyone is saying that she was only after the money! Well, tell me what you think?

We hosed her down. I was doing both pictures and video. Some of the guys tried to block me, but I still got the shots. She gets into the driver’s side of her PT Cruiser and she takes off. Everyone starts running to their cars; I did too only to realize that I was trapped by a Fed-Ex truck who parked next to me. What a bummer? Well, I had no choice so I called Georgie.

“It was Heather Mills,” I told her. Georgie was so happy to finally she put one on her record. “I knew that there was a purpose for knowing you longer than ten years,” I joked with her. Then she tells me that in her excitement, she called her husband, Bruce, and told him about it. Mind you, I have known Bruce for about two years and some months and he has already called me twice with good tips. She says to him, “I did it! I gave my first tip.” She pauses for a moment and continues, “There is a catch! If it wasn’t for all the Paparazzi, then I wouldn’t have spotted anyone, but I still did it.”

Well, I am going to give her credit. “Remember, there are new paparazzi that only spot photographers. Your spot is no different then theirs and therefore, it is a fair spot,” I told her.

Later in the day, I was driving down Beverly Blvd. heading westbound close to the Kings Road Cafe when I spotted Michelle Trachtenberg smoking away headed eastbound. I couldn’t make a U-turn because of all the traffic and so I made a right at the next street. Then I made a quick right onto the alley and I gunned it. I flew by two streets in no time. I made another right to get to Beverly Blvd. I made a left into the median divider and I spotted her car ten cars ahead of me. I continued passing cars on the divider until I was about three cars away, then I merged. My goal was to get behind her by one car. So I merged to the right lane. I passed another car, then to my surprise she merges onto my lane. I was now one car away. She gets to Fairfax and makes a right. I knew at that moment that she was headed straight to The Grove. She pulls into the parking lot and drives to the fourth floor. The parking structure was very full and it was hard to find parking. I lost visual on her car. I found a spot. I parked and I get my bag and I throw my camera into it. I get out of my car and I run to the escalators. She can only go down, I thought in my head. I go down the first escalator and look into the plaza center. I get my camera ready. I was going to hose her from the third floor. I waited for about two minutes. I realized that she already beat me down the escalators and that she was probably already inside one of the stores.

I placed my camera back in my bag and continued down the escalators. The hunt has begun. I start walking the stores looking inside each one. I wasn’t spotting her. I was about to give up, and all of a sudden I spotted the Mac [Apple] store. Now this would be a perfect ending to my hunt. I have been considering buying a Mac Laptop for awhile now. I walked inside and I asked one of the associates to point me in the right direction. I must have spent about 30 minutes looking and getting all the eye candy that I needed. It was time to go find someone else, so I left the store and I went to get my car. I looked for her car and noticed that she was also gone. I didn’t think much of it, since she is only worth one tank of gas. I was off to find another adventure.

Soon after, I was driving westbound on Melrose Ave. and I spotted Wendie Malick. Do any of you know who she is? She was in a show called “Just Shoot Me” with David Spade. Well, she was having a late lunch at Le Pain Quotidien. When I found her, it looked like she was having a serious solo conversation. She seemed to be talking to someone, yet no one was there. At first it seemed that she might have had an earpiece but none was visible. Initially, I thought that she was crazy. Then I figured it out, she was practicing a script.

She came out of the restaurant after some time and she gets into her little Mini Cooper. She drives off into the distance. Actually, she only made it about three cars in front of me, since that is how long it took me to get my car started. She was headed eastbound on Melrose Ave. We passed La Cienega Blvd. and soon after that she makes a U-Turn and finds herself a metered spot. I find parking across the street and I waited a few minutes for her to get out of her car. She gets out and walks the long way around her Mini Cooper making sure she gave me plenty of shots, although she didn’t know that I was there. Then she did something strange. When she gets to the front of her Mini Cooper, she bends over and looks to see if anything is under her car. She didn’t see anything; she feeds the parking meter and heads off to Wanna Buy a Watch Antique Jewelry store.

She is a fast shopper because she wasn’t there that long. She was only there for about 10 minutes and back in her car she goes. Then she makes another U-turn; she must have wanted me to follow her.

The final pit stop was at Fred Segal. She parks her car and quickly goes into the store. I find a good parking space and I waited for her to come out. She comes out in another ten minutes and gives me some nice shots.

I wanted to be a little creative with that shot, so I threw it in Photoshop and I added an artistic filter on it. Tell me what you think!

Henry Flores
Please Visit My Official Henry Flores Website:
http://www.henryflores.com

Also Visit My Global Distribution Agency To Buy My Photos:
http://www.buzzfoto.com

Thursday, August 17, 2006, 1:42 AM

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